I usually have 2. 2 of whatever I have for dessert. It’s usually 2 little things, like 2 little pieces of chocolate, or 2 little cookies but tonight I had 3. I chose to have 3 because I wanted another one. I made these little butterscotch cookie things with butterscotch chips, peanut butter and Fiber One cereal. They’re not really that good for you but better than a lot of different desserts that you might have. So I had another one.. 3. Butterscotch is such a delightful little taste and we hardly eat butterscotch anymore and I just couldn’t help myself. I started thinking about the people that I work with when I offer nutritional guidance. I have been judgmental in the past, always wondering how people let themselves get so overweight. But I have learned that it’s not always that simple. Addiction is a very difficult concept for me. It seems I have been fighting it all my life. Not my own, but the addictions of the people I love. I have never been able to wrap my brain around the continuance of a self-destructive activity. I used to smoke cigarettes. I quit 18 years ago after several failed attempts. But I quit. Done. Not doing it anymore. And I think that it should be just so with everyone, whether it be cigarettes, alcohol, drugs, seriously bad relationships or overeating. But it’s not that simple. We adopt certain behaviors because they work for us in the moment and we choose not to look further down the road at how we are hurting ourselves. We know, yet, we continue. Because we want to, because stopping leaves a void, because change, changes everything, EVERYTHING and that can be overwhelming. Being drunk numbs the pain, being high makes us likeable; being fat is an excuse why things don’t go our way. So we continue doing what brings us immediate gratification so that we feel better at the moment. It’s the same as having 3 tonight, because I wanted to. I do not judge people anymore. I know that there is a reason why they do what they do. But I must confess, I grow weary of watching. I have put myself in a position to offer help. Bottom line is we have to believe that we are worth it, worth taking care of ourselves. We have to take responsibility for this life to get the most fulfillments. My first husband died from alcohol, my 3rd husband died from colon cancer. The population grows obese as the diagnoses of diabetes continues at an alarming rate. And I understand. I had 3 tonight. But I won’t have 3 tomorrow. I’ll stay on my mission to eat for my wellbeing. I’ll do my exercises and go for my walk. I will not beat myself up over a little extra treat tonight. But a little extra treat will not become a way of life for me. Because I feel great! I want to feel great every day! I just want you to also…
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ReplyDeleteHere goes the 2nd try...As I told you I can't believe you stopped at just 3. NO WAY would I have been able to stop at just 3 with the way my week(life)has been going. I am realizing that I am an emotional eater when I am upset I start shoveling the food in. Now that I know what type of eater I am things are changing. In order to not shovel food into my mouth I need to come up with other things to do!!!! Well I just found the perfect outlet right here, I can come on here and write about it instead of going to the fridge or cupboards. I can go for a walk, a fast paced walk. Making changes to my eating habits making them healthy will help also. I have been slowly making changes adding salad to meals, substituting ground turkey or chicken instead of beef, something I just learned is mindful eating...being aware of what I am eating actually tasting it, enjoying the spices and flavors. This helps in not over eating. If you happen to over eat then don't beat yourself up about it just make sure you start again. After all, we all have our days and if we beat ourselves up then we're going to stop eating healthy. Just chalk it up to figuring out why you over ate in the first place. I have found that I really like hummus and veggies, I love trying new healthy foods or making my favorites healthier and sharing them with my family. I used to use jar sauce, now I use crushed tomatoes with basil, garlic and italian seasoning, I do make sure I find the one that has the least sodium and sugar because I have high blood sugar and high blood pressure. Knowing how to read your labels is a great way to eat healthier also. I have been weaning myself off of diet pepsi choosing to drink water with a lemon or lime slice in it. Having both is also a great taste. One thing I have also learned is you really have to want to change. I DO NOT DIET!!!! I don't deprive myself of what I want to eat because if I do then it becomes an obsession which turns into my emotional eating state and I will over eat. This is where Cathie's just 1, just 2 comes in, and I have found out too that if I buy it most times I don't want it after that. I also need to make sure I get in my walk, my bicycling even if its stationary, and exercise. I love Susan Powter who was popular in the 80's, Leslie Sansone and The biggest loser guy. These people not even knowing are helping me to get where I want to be not skinny but healthy, I don't have a certain weight in mind or even a certain size. I want to look in the mirror and say "I FEEL GREAT". Anyone that needs a fantastic mentor that does not judge then give this woman Cathie a call or email her, she is wonderful!!!
ReplyDeleteI agree completely, butterscotch is something we rarely eat anymore...this is because IT TASTES TERRIBLE!! Whenever anyone offers me a candy, and I see it is a Werther's Original, I immediately envision them as Wilford Brimley, you know, the oatmeal guy (the grandfather on Our House in the 80's).
ReplyDeleteI also wholeheartedly agree with your "real" statement...we have been given the most wonderful gift of choice. A blessing and a curse in one...from partners, to "extra curricular" activities, to what vehicles to drive. I also think that the choices we make are our own! As mentioned by one of the most poetic wisemen of our time, Mr. Edward Vedder..."I know that I will live, and I know that I will die, but the in-between is MINE" Sure, it sounds like some glorious moment in an after school special movie when the underdog realizes that he/she DOES have the power to overcome the bully in school...but shouldn't it??